Bringing Heaven to Hell-on-Earth

[The Midweek Encounter is a ministry of Encounter Church in Kentwood, MI. These posts are reflections on Sunday's message, which can be heard here each week: http://myencounterchurch.org/#/messages-media] 

In 2011, author Rob Bell’s theology was launched into the spotlight when he published his book, Love Wins, because it suggested the possibility that hell might not exist, or that hell might be a real place but ultimately empty because everybody might be in heaven. While Bell is comfortable leaving room for “the mystery of God’s love,” some mainstream Christians were ruffled by the suggestion that God’s plan of salvation might be more generous than they understood it. The controversy was so intense, in fact, that Bell’s book and its reception landed the cover of the April 14, 2011 Time Magazine with a headline that read, “What if Hell Doesn’t Exist?” Because of the controversy, some of Bell’s other salient points, like the argument that many people live in hellish circumstances here on earth, faded under the din.

I don’t know much about the theology of hell—whether it’s a physical place, eternal annihilation, or something else entirely—but I do know that too many people do live in a “hell-like” state here on earth. Some people are caught up in the hells inflicted by the selfishness or hatred of others and are subjected to endless war, terror, and abuse. Others construct their own hells through deceit, envy, or destructive patterns or habits. When Christ stepped into this world he came for salvation, to demonstrate how and why Christians should facilitate rescue wherever they can. Another way of thinking about this is that Christians live in this world to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with God. In other words, we’re here to bring a little bit of heaven to down to earth.

My kids have a children’s Bible called The Jesus Storybook Bible, and every time we read it I appreciate again the language of the “rescuer” who bridges the stories and spans the entire story of the Bible. Things go right or things go wrong, but Jesus rescues his people just the same. And Jesus’ examples of teaching, or feeding a hungry crowd, or calming a storm, or bringing a dead man back to life, demonstrate to us the possibilities for bringing a heaven-like experience to those who are hurting or hungry or terrified or spiritually unwell.

But before we adopt all the orphans or visit all the prisoners or sell our homes to fund World Vision, it’s critically important that we be sure that the rescuing we have in mind comes to us from God. Each of us is called to a rescue mission, but first we need to spend time in prayer asking God what that mission might look like. In the first chapter of Nehemiah, we learn what it looks like to find a mission, and it all starts with a broken heart. Nehemiah hears that people he loves are in chaos, despair, disgrace, and disrepair. Nehemiah’s first response is not to pack his bags or sell his possessions or march in the streets or start a GoFundMe. His first response is to mourn, to weep, to fast, and to sit in prayer with God to think more intentionally about what it might look like to bring a heaven-like experience to hell-on-earth. And when Nehemiah does uncover a plan that he believes is from God, he prays this prayer: “Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of this your servant and to the prayer of your servants who delight in revering your name. Give your servant success today…” (Nehemiah 1:11).

If you, like so many, desire to change the world—to bring a little bit of heaven into a hellish place, then the story of Nehemiah shows us one Godly path. Pray for your heart to break for the things that break God’s heart. Sit with God and that broken heart. Pray for a rescue plan. And pray that God will grant the rescue mission success in bringing heaven to earth.

[Kristin vanEyk loves Encounter Church and hopes that you have found a community at Encounter as well. You can find out more about what Kristin is up to here.]

Easter and Our Unanswered Questions

[The Midweek Encounter is a ministry of Encounter Church in Kentwood, MI. These posts are reflections on Sunday's message, which can be heard here each week: http://myencounterchurch.org/#/messages-media] 


Will I ever get better?

Why did my little sister have to die?

Which college should I choose?

Why do so many other people get to have happy marriages?

When will I finally get a job?

We all come to God with questions. Some of them are big and will seemingly never be answered in this lifetime; some are seemingly smaller, yet frustrating all the same. It’s tempting to approach Easter with its flowers and candy and Easter eggs and simply say, “Jesus rose from the dead! All is well!” And in a cosmic sense, Jesus’ resurrection makes that statement true, but in our day-to-day lives it often doesn’t seem that way. 

Photo Credit: Marko Horvat

Which is why we turn instead to a different resurrection--that of Lazarus. Because to get to a resurrection, first there must be a death. When Lazarus died, his sisters didn’t understand how this had happened. Their friend Jesus was the miracle-working Son of God, yet Lazarus not only fell terribly sick, but died and was buried for four days before Jesus himself finally arrived. It’s not surprising that Martha had a few choice words for Jesus when he arrived, starting out their conversation with, “‘Lord,’ Martha said to Jesus, ‘if you had been here, my brother would not have died.’” 

Martha’s actions here are a good example for us--she didn’t run away from Jesus with her questions, she ran to him with them. She was full of both anger and faith, but both of them were pointed in the right direction--directly toward Jesus. So when Jesus told her her brother would rise again, we can almost hear the resignation in her voice as she responded, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” Jesus didn’t leave it there though. He went on, telling her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” 

Even in the midst of her grief over the death of her beloved brother and the anger at Jesus over his refusal to step in and do something to stop it, Martha’s response was that yes, she believed Jesus is who he said he is--the Son of God. At this point in the story, Martha didn’t know what the ending would be. But whatever happened, she knew who Jesus was. Even her anger and frustration and confusion didn’t remove the true answer from her lips. 

Jesus’ question to Martha is the same one we have to answer today and each day we wake up to the brokenness, pain, and confusion we may face. “Whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”

Jesus didn’t immediately tell Martha he was about to raise her brother from the dead. Martha had to live in the space of death and heartache for a little while longer, and perhaps we may have to as well--for another day, another month, or another lifetime. Yet, a few verses later, Jesus himself wept at seeing the tomb where Lazarus’ body was. Far from being a God who sees our pain and responds with a condescending pat on the head and “It’s all going to be okay,” our God is one who not only wipes the tears from our eyes but cries alongside us. Resurrection may not happen exactly when we think it should or how we think it should. It’s not always instantaneous and it’s certainly not always pain free. But the words to Elevation Worship’s song Resurrecting are, even in the midst of great difficulty, true: 

By Your spirit I will rise

From the ashes of defeat

The resurrected king

Is resurrecting me

In Your name I come alive

To declare your victory

The resurrected king

Is resurrecting me

The resurrecting in our own lives may not happen once and then never again, because God never promised life would be easy. Each time we end up in the ashes of defeat, the resurrecting can happen afresh. And each time, God is right there with us. 


[Brianna DeWitt believes in Jesus, surrounding yourself with good people, and that desserts are best when they involve chocolate and peanut butter. She writes about faith, growing up, and whatever else pops into her head on her own blog, and tweets (largely about food) at @bwitt722.]

Response of Prayer

[The Midweek Encounter is a ministry of Encounter Church in Kentwood, MI. These posts are reflections on Sunday's message, which can be heard here each week: http://myencounterchurch.org/#/messages-media] 

Photo: A photographer in Sioux Center Iowa took this of my great grandfather, who was a praying man. 

Dear Bread of Life, 

We ask: “Who am I?” 

We ask: “What am I supposed to do with my life?”

We ask: “What is my purpose?”

We ask: “Where shall I live, where shall I work, whom shall I marry, what shall I buy?”

We ask: “How do I endure; how do i recover; how do I practice forgiveness instead of plot revenge; how can I possibly love them?”

I think sometimes we say “Jesus” but really we direct our questions to the wind because after the ask, we try to figure out all our own answers and solutions and control all our own outcomes.  

Forgive us for adding to you.  Forgive us for we add you to our list of possible satisfying or sustaining options. Forgive us when we practice Jesus And.  

“Rabbi, when did you get here?” -John 6:25 

But really we want to know, HOW. How did you get from that side of the lake to this side? How do you do what we cannot understand? Why don’t we ask the real questions we have - the deep question underneath the surface question? Is it because we don’t believe in you? If we did truly believe, then could we talk to you about what we don’t understand, but really want to know?  

“This is the work of God: that you believe [adhere to, trust in, rely on, and have faith] in the One whom He has sent.” -John 6:29, Amplified Bible

Jesus - whoever you are…we want what you have. Every day we want Bread of Life. 

Please be enough.

You’re enough, right? Right. So you will heal, right? You’ll protect, right? You will give me, get me out of, you will fix this, stop that, answer now, right? You will act the way I want, when I want, how I want, right?  

“I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.” -John 6:35

Again, Jesus, we are so sorry. Even in our want for you to be enough, we are wanting selfishly. We are asking out of pride. We struggle with sin.  

“I am all too human, a slave to sin. I don’t really understand myself, for I want do what is right but I don’t do it. Instead I do what I hate.” “And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right but I can’t. I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don't want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway.” “But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord!” -Paul's words found in Romans 7:14-15; 18-19; 23-25, which may reflect our own thoughts

You are enough. You show yourself and tell of your Father and make it clear that you are more than enough.  You are the bread of life with leftovers. You are God of surplus.  

You are necessary to each of us.  

Forgive us for adding to you because of doubt; because we don’t know you well, because we don’t trust, because we spend snippets of time with you rather than make space for long soaks where intimacy grows; because we're afraid, unsure, or new in our knowing you. You understand completely.  

Dear Bread of Life, you are enough. Thank you. Thank you so very much.  

Amen

In Jesus' eyes as he rides into Jerusalem on a donkey… 

“Above all, there is love, an endless, deep, and far-reaching love born from an unbreakable intimacy with God and reaching out to all people, wherever they are, wherever they will be. There is nothing he does not fully know. There is nobody whom he does not fully love.

Every time I look at this Christ on the donkey, I am reminded again that I am seen by him with all my sins, guilt, and shame and loved with all his forgiveness, mercy, and compassion.”


-Henri Nouwen, Palm Sunday from Show Me The Way 

[Laura DeGroot likes to laugh out loud, drink good coffee and eat delicious food...with Jesus her family and friends.  She has lived from the West to the East coast but Grand Rapids is home as of one whole year.  As The Caffeinated Woman, she speaks to groups of people about how ordinary life is profoundly better knowing an Extraordinary God, and works at Art Of The Table.  And she loves books.]

God's Hand of Protection

[The Midweek Encounter is a ministry of Encounter Church in Kentwood, MI. These posts are reflections on Sunday's message, which can be heard here each week: http://encounterchurch.org/messages] 


In Jesus’ day, shepherds took flocks of sheep out to graze and brought them back to the sheepfold for safety at night. Wild animals loved a tasty lamb chop dinner, so the caution was needed to keep the flock intact. Walls of the sheep pen would be topped with thorny branches to keep out climbing predators and often the shepherd slept at the gate to enforce the “no access” rule for the bad guys. 

When Jesus said, “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep,” it’s not hard to see the image of a protecting God, looking out for those who depend on and follow him. But if I’m being honest, it’s sometimes hard for me to reconcile this image of a protecting God with what I see in the world--people starving in South Sudan, children with brain tumors, innocents killed by drunk drivers, or broken relationships ending in divorce.  (Please tell me I’m not the only one who struggles with this?) It is hard to think of God as “protection” in these circumstances. What helps me make at least some sense of this is going back to what I know is true.

I know that God loves me. This is true. I know that miracles were never intended just to keep Christians healthy. This is true. I know that I live in a broken, messy world where rotten things happen…to everybody. This is true. I know that much of my spiritual growth and closeness with God has come about during the crummiest, excruciating, most painful experiences in my life. This is true. I hate that this is true, and if I were God’s Michigan representative, I would vote for this to change, but…it is true. But even Jesus didn’t get what he pleaded for from God in the garden of Gethsemane, and he was the person most deserving of God’s protection in the whole wide world. I find this oddly comforting in a way I can’t quite explain. 

So where does that leave me? I think my biggest block comes when I look at what I value as protection for my children and compare that to what God values as protection. As a parent, I value my children’s health and safety. I want them to be protected from sickness, pain, suffering, and grief. I want them to have good jobs that fulfill them, pay them enough to afford health insurance, and hope they never have to use it. And I want them never to die. Ever. 

God may have a slightly different perspective. God values qualities such as kindness, fortitude, faithfulness, self-control, freedom, and trust, and will give us opportunity after opportunity to grow in those attributes, even if it means some really rotten experiences. And against all reason and rational thought, we see it happen. The parents who walk through chemo with their four-year-old and still believe in the goodness of God. The grown children who lovingly care day after day for a parent with Alzheimer’s, even though he no longer knows who they are. The parents of children killed by an inexperienced young driver who go and pray with her and forgive her. We see it in ourselves when we give up our hurt and longing for revenge to speak the words “I forgive you.” God calls us into his kingdom and that begins here and now. God’s hand of protection begins by removing the heavy guilt that haunts us. He defends us against the things that steal and destroy the fullness of life we have in Christ. He takes us out of our gripping anxieties, our fears, our addictions, our toxic dependencies, and our screwed-up lives, and he calls our name and whispers “Come home.”

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy;

I have come that they may have life and have it to the full.”

John 10:10

[Sandy Navis is happily retired and spends her days doing pretty much whatever she wants to do. She is a firm believer in the power of laughter, singing while doing the dishes, crazy dancing while cleaning house, and eating chocolate every day. Sandy has three grandkids, who she loves to talk about even more than breadmaking.]

The Light of the World

[The Midweek Encounter is a ministry of Encounter Church in Kentwood, MI. These posts are reflections on Sunday's message, which can be heard here each week: http://encounterchurch.org/messages] 

John 8:12 says, “When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, ‘I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.’ ”

How many times have I heard that Bible verse, but never really thought too hard about it? Countless. Yup, Jesus is the light of the world. Got it.

It seems like such a simple and cliche idea—that Jesus is the light of the world. He shines eternal hope into our dreary earthly lives. But I think we need to stop and really explore the meaning of those words, and then let them sink in.

Light reveals God.

In the Old Testament, God’s presence, in the form of a pillar of fire by night or cloud of smoke by day, led Moses and the Israelites through the desert to the Promised land. This fire or smoke could be seen from far away and revealed to the Israelites that God was still with them.

There are moments in my life where the light of Christ shines in, letting me know that He’s still there, that He will never leave me, and that He never breaks His promises. Last week I was rocking my son to sleep and Jesus broke into my small little world and illuminated the miracle that he had given me. I just stared down at Gus’s little face and began crying, overcome with amazement that God created this little person and let me be his mama. I rarely stop to think about the miracle of life, but it’s moments like those where I know I can see the light of Christ shining into my life and revealing His presence.

Light guides us.

The fire and smoke in the desert were also guiding the Israelites to their final destination. The Israelites followed closely behind the presence of God, trusting that He would deliver them to the Promised land.

I’m the worst at following. I like to create my own plans and be the one to follow through on them; you might say I have control issues. Letting Christ lead me is extremely challenging, but I try to remember that the God who delivered the Israelites out of Egypt is the same God who sent His son Jesus to die and give me eternal life; why wouldn’t I give up control to a God like that?

Light exposes the darkness.

As we’ve had sunny days in Michigan recently, I have loved keeping our curtains open and soaking up some Vitamin D. Unfortunately for me, that sun also revealed some (okay, a LOT) of cobwebs that had accumulated over the winter. I’m sure they were there the entire time, but the light shining in our windows revealed them to me; and now that I had the knowledge of them, it meant dusting. And I hate dusting. But that’s besides the point. Sometimes God’s light shines into our lives and we see things that we wish we could keep hidden. He exposes all of our shortcomings, faults, and sins so that we can repent, change, and seek grace at Jesus's feet.

Photo credit: Flickr Creative Commons user goosmurf

Jesus is the light of the world.

These words mean so much more than our initial surface-level interpretation. Jesus's light lets us know that God is always with us and keeps his promises. We also can follow closely behind Jesus as He guides us with His light in order to fulfill God’s purpose for our lives. And finally, Christ’s light exposes the darkness in our lives so that we might hear His voice and choose to follow Him.

If you are seeing the light of the world for the first time, or the first time in a long time, be open to how God reveals Himself to you. If you’ve been walking blindly through life, not knowing which direction you’re headed, choose to follow in Jesus’s footsteps and live a life modeled after Christ. And if God is exposing some darkness in your life—whether that’s sin, shame, guilt, or addiction—allow His light to fill every corner of your dark heart and begin transformation in your life.

[Megan Stephenson is a proud new mom to her nine-month-old son August and spends her days trying to figure out how to take care of her tiny human. She also works for a private education group in Grand Rapids as an Assistant Registrar. Megan loves spending time with her husband, Ben, trying out new breweries, restaurants, and local attractions. She also self-identifies as a crazy cat lady, despite owning no cats of her own, thanks to her loving and allergic husband.]

Everything in Its Proper Place

[The Midweek Encounter is a ministry of Encounter Church in Kentwood, MI. These posts are reflections on Sunday's message, which can be heard here each week: http://myencounterchurch.org/#/messages-media] 

As a kid, when I heard Bible stories about idols I always thought of little golden statues that looked like animals or maybe animals with some human features. Since I didn’t have any of those mixed in with my stuffed animal collection, I figured I was probably good to go and the commandment about “You shall not have any other gods before me” was one I didn’t have to pay attention to. Even as I got older, the concept of idols wasn’t one I spent much time thinking about. Having idols was about praying to other gods, which I didn’t do, or getting too wrapped up in fancy possessions or an important job, which I didn’t have. Except eventually the idea got introduced that placing idols before God wasn’t just about loving the wrong things, but could be a matter of loving the right things in the wrong way.

Photo Credit: Tim Marshall

In 1 Corinthians 10, Paul is writing the church at Corinth to warn them of ways they may be going astray without thinking they are. He recounts various ways the Israelites were examples of what not to do, reminding his readers that the Israelites got caught up in wanting to be like their neighbors. Their desire to be like the other nations led them to create a literal idol out of gold, to engage in sexual activities God had specifically forbidden, and to test whether God would stay true to his word.

While these exact sins may not be temptations for us, Paul goes on to say, “So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” (1 Corinthians 10:12-14)

So I wonder if the real problem of idols comes less from what our idols are and more from why we have them. In the case of the Israelites, they let idols creep in when they took their attention off what God wanted for them and let their own interests take center stage. They chose things that were fairly obviously bad choices, but not all idols are created out of bad things.

One of the difficulties of being human is our incapability to love perfectly. Anytime we love, we will eventually, in some way, warp that love into some shape it was never meant to be. We’ll love too much or too little, too early or too late, with too much force or with not enough. There will be glimmers of perfection, because love is a reflection of God, but at some point our love will go off-kilter. This is how we end up with idols we never thought could become idols. Good gifts like jobs, spouses, vacations, kids, friends, or even our desire for these good things, can become idols when we strive after them instead of striving after God. Even our devotion to God, our desire to serve him well by doing good works and learning truth, can become an idol if we get caught up in the actions and forget that our true goal is to long for God himself.

We’re not resigned to a life of worshiping the wrong things though. As Paul promised, God will provide a way out--and the way is himself. When we can recognize that we’ve shifted God from being the center of our lives and pushed him off to one side, we are never so far gone that we can’t ask him to realign our priorities so he is centered again. As we look at our lives, what are the areas where we’re tempted to let good things become the ultimate thing? How can we invite God to become the center of our life again and let everything fall into its good and proper place on the sides? And are we willing to make the make the choices and the changes it will take to get us there?

[Brianna DeWitt believes in Jesus, surrounding yourself with good people, and that desserts are best when they involve chocolate and peanut butter. She writes about faith, growing up, and whatever else pops into her head on her own blog, and tweets (largely about food) at @bwitt722.]

Water Walking Shoes, Not Required

October 2012, JR and I arrived in the wake of hurricane Sandy as she left South Florida (from here on known as SoFlo) and headed up the coast to do some grand damage on the Jersey coast.  I took a walk along the Atlantic shore a couple days later, enjoying the surf show locals were putting on.  The waves were magnificent.  I had no idea this was not just another day at the beach for the masses of people in wetsuits hoisting surfboard off their cars and into the water.  Turns out, there were a lot of people too “sick” to go to work that day.  Waves like those produced by Sandy’s departure didn’t come around often.  I love the ocean.  

We moved from Colorado to SoFlo that October, just missing a storm, though our nearly three years living there seemed mostly stormy.  We left Colorado in a rented RV as I thought it might be fun to road trip, enjoying the country and taking this big transition slowly.  We left our house and less than 10 minutes later, our RV was stalling in the middle of an intersection just yards from the gas station.  HOURS later, we exchanged RVs - unpacking one and repacking the new one.  HOURS later we left on our adventure.  Again.  In our first two weeks, we would lose three contracts on our Colorado home and lose three contracts on places to live in FL.  We did not end up renting a house with a backyard and plenty of space.  We did rent a small apartment and had to give away more of our worldly goods - more than we already had when we packed up to move away from Colorado.  Within six months the corporate company JR had moved with started to show some ugly colors.  We were not adapting easily to a rough, rude, overcrowded, untrustworthy culture.  The ocean was great. 

I did not keep track of how many times I wondered or asked God outright - did we make a mistake?  Was this not your will for us?  Did we miss something?  Each time I asked, I felt a check in my spirit saying:  “Why do you ask that?”  

My response was always:  “Because this is so hard.”  

The question that followed:  “So difficulty = mistake made?”

I know better.  I have not only studied the Word enough to have been taught this, but have also lived through enough to know God doesn’t call his people to an easy life, to simple assignments, to a comfortable cozy country-club stroll through the park journey.  Yet here I was, having left the safe and familiar of many years; many friends; many places I knew how to get to; many jobs I knew how to do; many circumstances I knew how to navigate.  And It. Was. Hard.  So I doubted.  Though really, living within walking distance of the ocean was nearly nirvana.

My favorite story in the Bible is Peter walking on water.  Because he got to actually do that - walk on water, without water walking shoes; without previous water walking experience; no years of water walking training, and don’t forget, no previous human water walking ever recorded. He saw His master, wanted to be where He was, asked to come and do what His Master was doing and got the thumbs up.  I want to do that.  

Back in SoFlo 10 1/2 months in, JR came home from work and threw a piece of paper on the table, walked off to the bedroom.   The paper was filled with the inference JR had not been doing the job they wanted him to do and he would no longer keep the title nor the pay that he moved to Florida for.  He would have his previous job back.  In Florida.  What was written was so clearly  CYA language and not truth.  He just got handed this paper, no warning, no questions, no commentary, no conversation.  Over our tasteless dinner he said, “That’s it.  I’ve had enough.  I’m pushing the eject button.”

I simply nodded my head.  We were one week away from closing on a townhouse.  

After our tasteless dinner, I picked up reading  Isaiah in The Message from where we left off the previous night, chapter 40.  Its a good chapter - go look it up.  I’m not sure we could really ‘hear’ the Word, but we certainly ‘heard’ from the Lord as i began to read Eugene Peterson’s commentary on the chapter.  

“But God’s word about the future is a little different . It isn’t delayed but is rooted in the present.  He has us prepare the way for him in the desert of our present existence. 

That is to say, don’t build castles in the air, don’t construct an elaborate fantasy life about God’s future for you.  In the desert prepare the way of the Lord.  Right here where the going is roughest.  Here in a foreign place.  Here in exile.  

In this passage the geographical present is emphasized.   This very  dry, colorless, arid existence that seems to characterize the life of the sufferer - here is where the highway of God is to be built.  Don't’ look for some ejection button to push for an immediate escape.  Instead, build a highway, which takes time.  Build it well. And build it where you are.  EP” 

JR:  “It did NOT say that!”  

Me:  “uh, yes it did.”  And I handed him the Bible.  

We stayed for nearly two more years.  We met some fantastic people.  There were some delightful little people we fell in love with.  And of course there was more really rough going.  I stopped asking the question though.    We did our share of crying out to be saved.  The Lord did not always make the storm calm down.  He doesn’t always change our circumstances.  But He made it clear He heard us and that we were not alone.  

Truly Jesus is the Son of God  I say that with confidence, with honesty, with experience.  I’ll hang my hat on it.   

We moved to Grand Rapids in September of 2015.  The story has changed.  We like it here.  Though I have to be honest, 

I do miss that ocean.